Our Last Day in Zaporozhye

We thought our last day in Zaporozhye was going to be calm and relaxing. Well, it was anything but. We started out leaving the apartment at 8:15 to be at the passport place when they opened. Tanya went in and out a few times and after a few hours and $1400 later, they told us the passports would be ready between 3:00 and 4:00.

We went to the bank close to the orphanage to get money that they boys had in their account. The bank told us that they didn’t have that much money. The boys didn’t have a lot in their accounts so we thought it kinda crazy that a bank didn’t have that much money. Tanya, being as good as she is, asked them to call another branch and see if they had the money. So, then we went across town to that bank. She went in with me to withdraw the money for them. At first, they didn’t like that I wasn’t talking and ask why she was doing the talking for me. She said she was my translator because I didn’t speak Russian. I then heard her say that I spoke Russian very badly! Yes, I know this. They asked for several pieces of paper. We had a copy of the translation of my passport, but they didn’t want a copy of the official paper, they only wanted the original copy of the translation, which we didn’t have. Initially, they told us that we would have to go somewhere to get it translated and notarized. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, they came out and had me sign the copy of the translation several times in several places. They had Tanya fill out paperwork and it wasn’t until she filled out the original form three times that they said they could accept it. And, when you have twins, you have double the paperwork!

Once Tanya got them to say that yes they had the money and would give it to me, she had Lance and the boys come in the bank and Hasan take her to catch her train home. She was really ready to go home. I told her that was fine with us because as soon as she went home, that meant we got to go too. They finally gave me the money for the boys and we went outside to wait for Hasan to return. Our plans are to open an account for each of the boys and put this money in it for them. A start to college funds! It’s not much, but every little bit helps and hopefully will earn good interest over the years for them.

It was cold outside and Hasan had to help Tanya at the train station so he was going to be awhile. So, we walked down the street to go to City. com, a Circuit City type of store. I had been wanting to go there anyway. It is hard to just take your time and browse in stores here, because there are security guards and other workers that watch you like a hawk. Lance was with the boys making sure they didn’t touch anything and I looked for keyboards. I wanted a keyboard with Russian and English letters for the boys to use. The Houghtons had told us that they had bought one at this store in Kiev and it helped them to be able to type and communicate with the young girl they adopted. I found the keyboards and was deciding between which ones to buy when the boys found me and got all excited. I found a small one that had a USB connection and only cost 99 grivna. That was about $12.50 each. Knowing that each boy would want to type at the same time, I decided to purchase two. A black one and a silver one. That way, they could tell which one belonged to whom and being USB, they would connect to any of the computers we had. I’m so excited that they are both into technology, but it sure does make it hard for me to get anything done on my computer. We walked around another large building with small stores and kiosks in it and the boys were amazed at what they saw. We had so much fun just watching them.

Hasan then picked us up and we went to McDonalds for lunch. The boys were excited since this was the first time they got to eat there since our court hearing and they had been looking forward to it. We didn’t have much time, so after we ate, we headed to the orphanage to have their “sweets table” with their classmates. They were just coming back from lunch when we got there, so they weren’t too excited about the sweets, but spread them out anyway and left them for later.

At first, the boys just kinda visited a little, we took group pictures and then they got excited telling about the big Amstore that they had been to the night before. The kids were asking them all kinds of questions about what they had seen and done since leaving the orphanage. All the kids were excited about what the boys were experiencing so far. Lance started early telling the boys that they had 15 minutes left, then 10 and then 5. Once the boys started realizing it was almost time to go, they started getting very emotional. Some of the kids had already given them small presents to remember them by. Hugs were being passed around along with well wishes and reminders to keep in touch. Tolic, being the emotional one, couldn’t take it and had to go out into the hallway. He started crying a lot and his friends followed him out into the hallway to give him hugs and tell him just how much they loved him. It was very emotional for all of the kids. They have become a family and spend everyday all day together. Leaving each other and never knowing if and/or when they would see each other again was more than some of them could take. I told all the kids that they were very special, that all of us would never forget them and that the boys would stay in contact. I have lots of pictures of very special kids in that class that sure would love families! If you are interested, I’ll be more than happy to share them with you so that you too could fall in love and bring them into a loving family and a home. The entire class is beautiful and most of them are calm and would be wonderful to raise as your own .

The tears were more than I could tolerate. Tears were streaming down my face as well and for the first time, I realized how when your children hurt, you feel their pain immensely! Being a parent, for even just a few days has given me insight into how God must feel toward us, His children. Amazing!

They said their good-byes and even the gentleman that watches the door and hallway came down to say his good-byes and tell the boys he would miss them. I was glad to see this because, even though we had invited the director, office staff and nursing staff to come to the sweets table, none of them showed up. We did invite Jessica, the lady from America that teaches them English to come, and she even braved the bad weather to show up. I was so glad she came and so were the boys. She was emotional too as she loved the boys too. We promised to keep in touch. As we finally, made our way down the hall, a few of their very best friends walked out with us. Igor, a great kid that is Tolic’s best friend, followed us all the way to the end of the hall. They said good-bye at the door, then again right outside the door, and then as Tolic started walking down the hall, he turned back around to see Igor one more time. Igor, was in total tears as I was too. Tolic asked Lance if he could give his new mp3 player that uncle Jimmy bought him to Igor. Lance said that if he wanted to that he could. So, with giant tears streaming down his face, he went over to Igor again and gave him his new mp3 player. Igor couldn’t believe that he gave him this great thing and cried even harder. With tears streaming down all of our faces and dropping on our shoulders and even all the way down to the floor, we turned one last time to leave. I was last to go out the door, so I turned to Igor, gave him a huge hug and told him that he was a very good friend and Tolic would write to him. He hugged me harder and we turned to go. I tried to videotape my boys walking down the stairs, but it was hard to do. As we got outside, boys were looking out all the windows and saying good-bye and telling the boys they loved them. It was so sad and my heart was breaking into pieces for all of them. Even now as I write this, there are tears in my eyes.

My three guys got in the back seat and I got in the front. It was a very quiet ride for a while as we were all crying and sniffling and wiping tears. Lance had his arms around the boys in the back seat to comfort them. Once I was able to talk again, I told Lance that Tolic giving away his mp3 player that he loved so much was one of the most pure and beautiful things I had witnessed on this trip. What a heart of gold to give away something he loved so much for someone he loved so much. No wonder God tell us in the Bible to be like little children. It reminded me of the story of the girl with the pearl necklace that her dad asks for and she doesn’t want to give it to him because she loves it so much. Finally, one night she does give it to him, and then he is able to give her a real string of pearls. The moral of the story is that God wants us to give us so many precious things, but sometimes we have to give up something that is so near and dear to our hearts to be given the real gift! I wanted to go out and buy Tolic his on iPod because of his generosity. Of course, we can’t do that here and we don’t have the money now to do so anyway. We did tell him later what a precious thing he did for his friend and how we are so very proud of him. He hasn’t even really wanted to borrow Dima’s mp3 player much and we can’t tell that he regrets giving his away. I’m sure he doesn’t because he gave it to someone so precious.

We went to purchase tickets for the train, so that we could leave tonight. They didn’t have tickets on the late train that we wanted because we wanted to have more time to spend with Babushka. They didn’t have the normal compartments with four beds that we normally purchase. They only had business class compartments for the 7:30 train available. So, wanting to leave so badly, we booked those. They were more expensive of course, but it was worth it to be able to go to Kiev tonight.

Once we had tickets in hand, we went back to clean the apartment and to pack. We didn’t know this morning if we would be leaving or not, so we still needed to pack some. It didn’t take too long, and luckily, I had already cleaned the kitchen this morning.

We wanted to go to Ashan, the large grocery store to purchase some more movies that were not boot-legged, had English and Russian on them and were on sale. However, we ran out of time to do this. It was way more important to go to see Babushka than to purchase movies. We called Dasha, their aunt, to let her know we were coming when we first got to the apartment.
I knew that if the orphanage was so emotional a good-bye that Babushka’s was going to be 10 times worse. While we were packing, the boys made cards for Babushka. Dima drew hearts etc. on his, while Tolic drew a little on his, but wrote a large paragraph to her. I didn’t ask to see what he wrote, but I’m sure it was very touching. He tucked both cards away in his pocket on his sweatshirt to keep them safe before giving them to her.

We got to Babushka’s and right away, I had tears in my eyes. Before I let them fall, I tried to contain them and asked for pictures with Babushka and her quilt with the boys. It was so emotional when we gave it to her that I forgot to take pictures of them with it. Luckily, I was able to get a few pictures before the tears came flowing. Babushka had already taken the quilt to work to show her friends and she said they couldn’t believe how wonderful it was and that they cried too. She already had it hanging on her wall in her bedroom. She says she looks at it everyday several times and is so thankful to have it so that she can remember the boys and see them all the time.

We told Babushka and Dasha that we were leaving tonight. We had warned them the day before that we might, but that we didn’t know for sure. They were so sad that today would be their last time with the boys for a while. I could understand. They tried to locate their other Babushka, the father’s mother, but had a hard time finding her on the phone. They wanted to the boys to be able to say good-bye to her as well. She is 74 years old, so there is no way she could care for the boys.

The boys were just kinda playing around the house, I think to avoid the fact that they were there to say good-bye. Tolic, even went into the other room to be alone. I had to pass through the other room to do something and asked him if he was going to give Babushka her card. He said he was saving it for when he left. I think it is easier to give it and go than to watch her read it and have to deal with that emotion. As Lance started to give the warnings of how much time was left, they started getting more emotional. Babushka and I didn’t have to wait for the countdown, we were already emotional and had already been crying and hugging for some time. I think it might have in some ways been harder for the two of us to say good-bye than it was for the boys. Dima came in the room and said that Tolic was on the couch crying. So, Babushka went in there to sit and talk with him. I wanted to videotape it, or take pictures, but we stayed in the other room and decided that it was their moment and that we shouldn’t interfere with it. I don’t know that I would want someone taking video of me crying with my grandchildren if I was saying good-bye as they were leaving to move to another country.
We said good-byes as well as we could. By this time, tears were everywhere and Dasha and I hugged and cried a little together. I promised that we would keep in touch and I apologized several times tonight for the time we had before leaving was so small. They understood, but it didn’t make it any easier to say good-bye. Babushka walked out with us, and we didn’t realize that she was going with us. The car was full of luggage, even in the front seat, so all five of us had to squeeze in the back. She proceeded to tell Hasan where the other Babushka lived. He said we didn’t have time and Babushka said it would be quick. Lance said he didn’t know this was happening. As far as we knew up to this point, they had not been able to get in touch with her. We walked down the walk to her house and she came outside after bundling up to say good-bye. She looked like what a Babushka is supposed to look like. 74 years old and in her scarf and dress, she was a typical Ukrainian Babushka. She gave all hugs and said she was sorry we were leaving tonight. At least she had recently spent some time with the boys when they were at Babushka’s over the weekend. The boys hugged her and said good-bye and she walked out into the dark alleyway to say another good-bye, wave to us and watch us walk away. I of course, couldn’t contain the tears any longer. When we got to the car, we had to say our final bye to Babushka, Lance just had to make me get in the car. Which was good because we didn’t have long to catch our train. Tolic pulled out the cards and gave them to Babushka. They hugged as tears streamed down both their faces and the crying couldn’t be contained. He then climbed in the car and waved to Babushka as we pulled away. I knew the long walk home for her would be a cold, sad and lonely time. I prayed for her and the boys as we drove away.
This is the first time that I heard Dima crying. He was sitting on my lap and I could hear him crying, sniffling and wiping his nose. What a huge roller coaster ride this must be for these boys. Babushka is really the only person that has cared for these boys over the last several years and the only person that ever visited them at the orphanage.
The ride to the train station was another quiet time in the car. The only thing you could hear were quiet cries, sniffling and the wiping of little noses.

We got to the train station, gathered our luggage, and weaved our way through the crowds and to the train that was waiting outside. Hasan helped us board, carry our luggage on and get into our compartments. The boys were amazed at the compartments as they had only ridden a train once before and then they were in the wagon with lots of beds scattered about. Having two beds in each compartment was so cool to them. Once we took off and the lady took our tickets, Tolic and I joined Lance and Dima in their compartment. We had a little to eat, we had some left over’s from the night before and purchased drinks from the lady as she came by. The boys picked out a snack from her basket too. Tolic chose chicken flavored peanuts. That was an interesting combination that I wasn’t expecting when I plopped a few in my mouth! The boys were so excited that it was all they could do to sit still, well, I don’t really think they sat still for more than 30 seconds at a time. We decided to play a game to calm them down a little. But, when it wasn’t their turn, they were all over the compartment, even climbing up into the top area where the extra blankets were kept.

Finally, we decided it was time to calm down. The boys went with me to my compartment and I let them play for 3 minutes each on my computer. Three minutes goes by very quickly! Then Lance got Dima and we tried to go to sleep as we were going to get into Kiev very early and needed to get some rest. Well, trying to get 10 year old crazy excited boys to sleep is not so easy. Lance finally relented and let Dima listen to his mp3 player and I pulled up iTunes and Tolic and I listened to music until he fell asleep.

Tolic slept through the night, but Lance said Dima was up several times to go to the bathroom because he had drank almost every drink we bought. The train was pretty comfortable even though Hasan had told us that business class on the early train really wasn’t anything special. We did find that the lines were much better and the service people in the business class were much more friendly and helpful.